Symbolism

According the Principle, many things in the Bible are symbolic. Examples are the Tree of Life, the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil, and the Serpent. The Principle states that the Tree of Life represents what Adam was hoping to become - a person who is totally one with God. The Bible mentions the Tree of Life several times as something that all of us are seeking, but has been blocked from us since man separated from God (referred to as "The Fall of Man" in the Principle.) When you think about it, this is what all of us desire. We want to have power, wisdom, and to be the center of the universe - to be God-like. Somewhere within each of us, we know that we were not meant to live the mediocre lives that we are now living. Each one of us was meant to live on a much higher level, living powerful lives, fulfilling our greatest purpose and making a significant impact in the world. We also know that our lives were meant to be filled with joy, peace and security instead of unhappiness, fear and sorrow. Somewhere deep inside of us is a long-forgotten memory of the peace and happiness we experienced as small children, and we long to go back to the Garden, to go Home. Why else do we turn to drugs and other artificial substances to "get high" and to feel good? That's because we were meant to be high ALL the time, to be euphoric, but in a natural way that blessed the world instead of damaging ourselves and others.

Unfortunately, in this confused world sometimes this desire for power and control has become twisted into something evil and self-centered. Think of Hitler, Stalin, and others who wanted to take over the world and become like God. The real model of absolute power and dominion was Jesus. He had all of God's power, wisdom and authority at his disposal because he was completely unselfish and filled with God's love. This is what true power is all about and this is what Adam was meant to grow to become.

Back to the Garden. The Principle says that the Serpent represents Lucifer, who was the head angel at that time and the one closest to God. I don't know about you, but when I heard this it completely went over my head because I didn't believe in angels and this sounded too much like a fairy-tale to me. But now, many years later, I've actually come to believe in angels. That's because I have experienced so much incredible spiritual guidance and support in my life since joining the church. I will go more into detail about that another time, but suffice it to say, I do believe that there is someone out there watching out for me, whether it be angels or people who have passed away who are guiding me.

So Adam was represented by the Tree of Life and Lucifer was represented by the Serpent. So who did the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil symbolize and what was the "Fruit" that was passed from Lucifer to Eve and then to Adam? The Principle says that the Fruit represented love. Lucifer became jealous of Adam and wanted to take the love of Eve for himself. Also, he realized that Adam and Eve were meant to become the ultimate heirs of God's love and he feared that he would lose his position as the one most loved by God. So Lucifer seduced Eve to gain power over her and then over Adam, and to put himself above them and God. Since Eve was still immature at the time and had not yet grown into a perfect relationship with God, she was vulnerable to temptation and did not yet have the wisdom to understand what was happening. As I mentioned earlier, if she had already established a rock-solid love relationship with Adam centered on God, there would be no way in the world she could be tempted (imagine being married to Jesus - do you think you could you be tempted by another man?)

Eve is represented by the Knowledge of Good and Evil because after her sexual relationship with Lucifer her eyes were opened wide and she understood that what she had done was completely wrong and that Adam was meant to be her husband. And for the first time in her young life she experienced the emotions of shame and fear. Instead of the freedom and happiness that she had experienced before in her relationship with God, she was now afraid. Think of a child who has done something wrong and is afraid to tell his parents. I remember the times when my son would cry whenever he did something wrong. Maybe he was afraid I was angry or that I wouldn't love him. I don't know exactly what he was feeling. But I do know that whatever it was, it was causing him anguish. But after he told me the truth and I forgave and hugged him, the world was a happy and secure place for him again. This is what Eve should have done - gone to God and told the truth, even though difficult. But instead, she brought Adam down with her by handing him the fruit and seducing him. Now both of them were ashamed and afraid, and out of their shame they covered the lower parts of their body where they had sinned.

From this point forward, their innocence was gone and God could not have a direct relationship with them as he had before. A completely pure God cannot relate directly with impure human beings. Some conditions have to be met in order for this to happen. That is the focus of the rest of the Principle which I will go into later. So now God was unable to guide Adam and Eve to full maturity and to becoming the loving parents of all humanity. Instead, their immaturity and inability to love, along with their propensity for hate and fear was passed from generation to generation.

Back to my family and how I recognized the Principle at work there. I saw that the repetition of the Fall had taken place in my own family. My mother was unhappy in her marriage. Rather than ask for help and work out the difficulties, she allowed herself to be seduced by another man. In Eve's case, instead of going to God when she became confused about her relationship with Lucifer, she allowed herself to be seduced by him. When my father was kicked out of our family and the other man moved in, all hell broke loose. Everything that could go wrong, did, and all of us suffered as a result. Likewise, after the Fall, the entire world descended into darkness and into a living hell.

Broken Families

So how was I able to relate my life to the first lecture? I thought about all the dysfunctional families starting from my own and going all the way back in time. When I was growing up, my mother and father had not been able to really be there for me or my siblings. My parents got divorced when I was 9 and a few years later, my dad gave up the right to visit us on weekends. He then basically disappeared from our lives. My mom remarried, but the man she married was a jerk and totally irresponsible, and couldn't hold down a job. So my mother worked hard to support a family of 7 (5 kids and 2 adults.) When she came home from work, she was drained and unable to give us kids the love and attention we needed. So in a sense, we were without parents. Our basic physical needs were taken care of but not our emotional ones.

I realized that both my mom and dad had not had perfect family lives either, which probably contributed to their divorce and other problems. My mom's father abandoned her and her mother when she was only a baby. My dad grew up feeling unloved by his father. But then I went even further and thought that probably my grandparents had had their own problems as well that got in the way of them being the loving parents they were meant to be. So if you look for the source of problems in families, you have to keep looking further and further back. Therefore, it made sense to me that the very first human ancestors were not mature and could not give their children the love and guidance they needed.  Hey, Cain killed Abel. Where were Adam and Eve when this was happening?  Obviously they did a terrible job at parenting, so much so that one of their children killed another. Even in this messed up world with all its problems, we rarely hear of a brother killing his own brother. So that first family must have been really messed up. And this family dysfunction has been passed on from generation to generation.

Somewhere along the line the buck has to stop being passed, the legacy has to be broken. Parents need to love each other with a love that can never be broken and then pass on that standard of love to their children. This was the purpose of Jesus. But I'll talk about that another time.

The second lecture explained how mankind separated from God and the ideal. Next time I'll talk about that and about how I was able to see parallels in my own life with it.

On vacation.  Will be back in a few days.

Weekend Workshop

I went to the workshop the following weekend and heard the entire series of lectures known as the "Divine Principle" (DP), which are the teachings of Reverend Sun Myung Moon of Korea. There were about 6 lectures total over the weekend, with discussions after each lecture and breaks for meals, free time and entertainment.

The lectures consisted of talks about the ideal world we were meant to live in (and what we all long for in our deepest hearts - a world filled with love and peace), the separation from the ideal, and God's work throughout history to return the world back to the ideal. There were also some talks on other topics such as Predestination and Resurrection. The one on Predestination basically said that the only thing predestined for sure is God's ideal, loving world. Everything else, such as Christians being predestined for heaven and everyone else for hell is just a bunch of hogwash! The one on Resurrection said that resurrection is not literal, such as Christians being resurrected right through the roof of their churches (Ouch! That sure would hurt when they hit their heads!) What resurrection really means is the resurrection of our spirits and our hearts - in other words, our spiritual growth. So there is a lot of stuff in the Bible that is not meant to be taken literally.

All of the lectures were based on the Bible, so most of it went right over my head. But the first lecture made a lot of sense to me. It said that the original ancestors of humanity were meant to grow to perfection before having a family. Perfection is defined as complete unity with God. Therefore, a perfect person is someone who can love all mankind as much as God does and has a parental heart towards all people. (I had a taste of this parental love during my drug experience.) Only on this basis are people then qualified to start a family and parent their own children.

They said that Jesus was the only perfect person who ever lived on earth. He completely embodied the love of God through his incredible love for people, to the point of even being willing to die for his enemies. Amazing! They said that the first ancestors were meant to grow to become like him, essentially becoming a Jesus-like man and a Jesus-like woman. Then when they got married, nothing could ever separate them because their love would be rock-solidly based on God's love (not just on romance, attraction or other things that wear off eventually.) Therefore, no divorce or breakdown of families would be possible. Also, as love-filled people, they would exemplify this love to their children as well as teach them the highest standard of love. Their children would then learn to love each other and the natural world around them (instead of abusing it). This would be an ideal family. Then, when this family multiplied and spread it would expand to an ideal tribe, nation and world. This would be the Kingdom of Heaven on earth, or God's ideal. Upon death, people would then enter the Kingdom of Heaven in the spiritual world.

Next time I'll briefly explain what went wrong in the beginning according to DP. I'll also explain how the first and second talk made sense to me based on my own experience of growing up in a dysfunctional home.

Visiting the Center

I went to the "center" with the Japanese man (that's what they called their churches - they were located in homes, not church buildings) and listened to 2 lectures given by a black guy named Reggie. The first lecture described what an ideal world would be like, and from their point of view, what it was meant to be from the very beginning of history. The second lecture focused on what went wrong in the beginning and why we're living in this messed up world instead of in the ideal. It was based on stuff from the Bible, so most of it went over my head. However, I was at least familiar with the characters they mentioned - Adam, Eve, Satan and of course, God.

After the lectures we had our meal. This was my first experience with Japanese cuisine. They prepared something called chicken curry, which I had never heard of or had before. It was a spicy, flavorful sauce with chicken and vegetables served over rice and very tasty. It was especially delicious since I had had nothing to eat since breakfast, and by now it was late in the afternoon. After the dinner a lot of attention was paid to me, with various people coming up to me to talk. Two things struck me about these people. One was that they were dressed very conservatively. The guys wore slacks and button-up shirts with ties. The girls wore dresses, skirts or nice pant suits. All the guys had crew cuts and the women kept their hair relatively short as well. I felt out of place since most of the people I associated with were the hippie types. This was the early 70s with the hippie movement in full-force and I completely identified with it. Both males and females kept their hair long, wore jeans or cut-offs, and t-shirts. Also, I had given up wearing a bra awhile back (too sexist) and usually wore a halter top. I went barefoot most of the time as well. So these people seemed very strange to me.

The other thing that struck me about the people was their diversity. There were people from all over the world such as Austria, Italy, Japan, Israel, Honduras, and France to name a few, along with some Americans. And they were all living together, communal style, in this large center (house). They said that they believed in the unity of all people and I could see that they really practiced it.

Somehow these folks managed to convince me to stay with them for a few more days instead of going to Pensacola. They said that the following weekend the entire lecture series would be presented, so then I would get a more complete picture of what their ideology was all about and could decide whether or not this was for me. Since I was not completely set on going to Pensacola and was still searching for answers, I decided to stay. That few days turned into years.

Back in New Orleans

After my trip down south, I returned to Chicago where I stayed a few months with my mother and step-father. However, the search for answers had not ceased and I was still very restless. Finally, I decided to return to Pensacola after receiving another invitation from the 13-year-old girl to stay with her.

On June 16, 1974 I caught a bus to New Orleans, where I was to transfer to a bus to Pensacola. However, I never made it to Pensacola. I had taken an all-nighter to New Orleans and it was early afternoon when I arrived at the bus station. Since I had some time to kill before catching the next bus, I decided to stretch my legs and step outside the station for awhile. While standing there, gazing at the city around me, I was approached by a young Japanese man who invited me to attend a lecture. Normally, my response to someone like that would have been, "Get lost!" I had been approached many times before in Chicago by Hare Krishnas and other religious groups, and I wanted absolutely nothing to do with them or any religion. As a self-proclaimed atheist, I couldn't believe there could be a God with so much suffering in the world. So I stayed as far away as possible from religious people.

It was only because of a combination of circumstances (or fate?) that I actually decided to go to the lecture with this man. My main reason for going with him was the look in his eyes. When he looked at me, he didn't have that sexual look that I had come to expect. This took me completely by surprise. I couldn't believe that he looked at me with such pure eyes. So something inside of me trusted him (a little). The second reason for going was that I was hungry, and he had mentioned that a meal would be served after the lecture. So off I went with him, little knowing that my life was about to completely change.

On the Road

On a cold day in February, I walked away from school. I was so unhappy and desperate for answers and was certainly not finding them at school. I thought to myself that life was not worth living if there was no purpose to it. So why continue going to school? I decided to take a gigantic leap and leave everything behind to search for the purpose of life.

I packed my few belongings into a bag, went to the bank to withdraw what little money I had, and began walking down the street away from the college. I hitch-hiked to Chicago, went to the bus station, and bought a one-way ticket to New Orleans. I chose New Orleans because I had no idea where I would stay and thought that I had better go someplace warm in case I needed to sleep outside.

Altogether, I spent about 3 weeks in the south, hitch-hiking from place to place and staying with whoever would take me in. The first person I met was a young man who, like myself, was on the road and hitch-hiking. We stayed together for a few days until one morning I woke up to find that he had disappeared with all my money.

A lot of those 3 weeks is a blur in my mind and I don't remember much of it. But I do remember a few people who took me in. I remember staying with a lonely older man who was looking for companionship. This might have been right after I lost all my money and had no where to turn. Staying with him was very depressing though and I soon left. Then I stayed for awhile with a woman who lived in a trailer with her kids. I remember being very grateful for the rich southern food she fed me like sausage, bacon and biscuits. But her trailer was filthy and full of roaches. Eventually I moved on from her place as well.

I hitch-hiked to Pensacola next and met a 13-year-old girl who wanted to take me home like a lost little puppy. But when I got to her house I was surprised by all the chaos. There were younger children running all around and no adult seemed to be in charge. Instead, this poor 13-year-old was. She desperately wanted me to stay. I could see that she looked up to me as the older sister she never had and really needed. But unfortunately, I had to disappoint her. I stayed with her just a few days and then left. Before I left she begged me to stay and could not understand why I had to go "search for the meaning of life."

Through all of this time there was sex, although I've blocked out most of that from my mind since it was so negative. I suppose I was a sitting duck for predators since I was completely dependent on others for help and was so mixed up about sex anyway. When looking back at this period in my life I believe that it was only by God's grace that I did not get into serious trouble or even end up dead.

Finally, I went to a forest preserve (somewhere) and spent the night sleeping outside on my coat. After waking, I sat on a curb for awhile wondering what I would do next. While sitting there, a park ranger pulled up in his truck and asked me what I was doing. I don't remember what I told him but he ended up bringing me home to his wife. They were both middle-aged and Christian. I stayed with them for a couple days and during that time the wife preached to me about the Bible and Jesus. It all went completely over my head. I could not relate to anything she said and remember one statement in particular that really turned me off. She said that my problem was that "I had been allowed to live selfishly." That was not what I needed to hear at that moment in my life. But they also did something that really surprised me. They bought me a one-way ticket back to Chicago and sent me home. I was very ready to go home by that time.

I left there being puzzled by this couple. I couldn't understand how complete strangers could take me in and then pay for a ticket home as well, which for me at that time seemed like a lot of money. They had nothing to gain from me like others who had taken advantage of me in the past. I was more used to that and the world seemed to be a very selfish, evil and dangerous place to live. Men in particular I thought, had only one thing on their mind and I was sick of seeing that sexual look in their eyes whenever they approached me. But this couple was different somehow and I didn't know why they had treated me so kindly. Unknowingly to me, a seed had been planted by them that would bear fruit in the near future.